From an anonymous diary

I have read in some books that children have a very simple and happy life. I can not agree on that. I was studying 7th at that time if i remember correctly. My studies started to get dull at that time, since I was concentrating on other worthless things (according to 99 per cent of the indian parents), like games and drawing. It showed in my progress report obviously. And there was a guy, assume his name as X. He took first marks in the class at that period. I came down from 1 to 2,3, and to 5th rank in the class. Yes, now if you think, and I also found out pretty early than others, that these are just numbers, but I had to bear with my parents' scoldings at that time. And also (some of the studious) friends around you just fly away like crows when your marks go down in school. Lets come to X now.

He was very smart, and had a very calm personality. He had a smile on his face all the time. Always there were at least two guys around him, singing praises about him. His hand writing was superb, and he played football beautifully. But I never saw him helping anyone in studies or in any other way for that matter. Somehow I sensed his smile was very poisonous. He always used to flatter me with words like 'Hey buddy, You are the top ranker holder in the class man!' or 'Hey, You know every thing man!', when he was the top student in the class. Because of him, until this day, if someone comes to me and says words like these, i want to run away from that place or I want to smack that person down. I did not like him, because for some reasons unknown I sensed, he did not like me. And I must say I was jealous of X.

Once there was this annual day function came. They announced many competitions. X and his sidekicks were participating in most of the competitions. So due to this peer pressure, I too had given my name in drawing and essay writing competitions, because X had already won most of the other competitions. I hoped to win at least one. In the essay competition, the topic was 'Population Explosion'. The winners of such competitions were mainly judged based on their hand writings (Content is secondary). I did not prepare anything, but tried my best to write some stories. But I do not know from where these wild imaginations come from, but my essay went like this under the subsection 'Population Control'. I wrote, 'Apart from birth control methods our govt currently has, since our population is gone out of control we can consider killing people based certain criteria, like aging people or beggars'. I do not know whether I added the phrase 'aging people or beggars' since it was long back, but I still remember vividly, that the word 'killing' was definitely there.

When I submitted my essay, my hands were trembling slightly, I did not know why. But I could guess some thing was wrong, I thought I made a terrible mistake, but it was too late to correct it. In the next two days I thought of running away from everyone and to some unknown place, but i did not have the courage. But still there was no news about the result of the competition and about my 'essay'. As usual X came to me and said, 'Hey Dude! As always you are gonna win this competition!' and the sidekicks started laughing at me. And he asked me what I wrote in the essay competition, and I said what I had written. Then again they all burst out laughing. My body started sweating unusually. After half an hour I think, a boy came and said that the Teacher who was the Judge for the Essay Competition wanted to meet me. I was on the verge of peeing in my trousers.

I went there, and she was reading my essay there! I was simply standing there almost crying. I was trying very hard to control my tears. She looked up at me, I cant say whether she was looking at me furiously or was it just a blank stare. And after a few seconds of silence, she simply said 'Okay, go!'. I ran like bull, entered my class room, and sat there trembling and I was drenched in sweat, staring at the blank wall.

That was the last competition I participated. I regained the top rank of the class some how. But X's studies hit very low when I finished my schooling.

Almost ten years are gone, last year my aunt asked me to go with her for shopping. We entered a small textile showroom. There I saw the Teacher who judged that essay competition. I was not sure whether she recognized me, but I slowly started walking out. My aunt was yelling my name, but I had already started running towards my house.